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    One Clomid Cycle Down

      We tried it. We tried Clomid. We doled out the cash ($50 for my low-dose), with no help from our insurer (thank you for nothing Blue Cross Canada). I took the pills. I got the side effects. Then, I went for the ultrasound and had a stranger move the wand aggressively around my most … Continue reading

    i hate mother's day

    I Hate Mothers’ Day.

      I hate it. I wish the holiday would burn in the fire of a thousand hells and that its ashes would be dropped in the Marianas Trench where they could be gobbled up by vent-dwelling phytoplankton and tiny crustaceans. And I wish ONE person would have said something nice. A simple, “hey, thinking of … Continue reading

    New Job

    So….I changed jobs on Thursday. I am officially the newest radio reporter in my town. I got to leave my former toxic workplace and I feel like I’ve ascended to heaven. I’m LOVING my new job and the people I work with. LOVING it!   Secretly, I even like the way my voice sounds on … Continue reading

    Like riding a bike, right?

    I hope blogging is like riding a bike. I think I need this again. I met a lot of friends here and didn’t quit blogging to abandon them (you). I just couldn’t write about infertility anymore after my last group of posts. It felt like it was wash,rinse,repeat on a painful, grief-filled cycle and, really, … Continue reading



    This test looked negative. I could see an evaporation line, but I can always see an evaporation line. I gave it it up and I let it sit. Hours later I came back to throw it away (I don’t know why I didn’t from the start) and there’s this: The bottom of the trigger line … Continue reading

    Don’t buy these

    First Response Early Response tests are useless. Don’t waste your money if you’re still TTC. Positives are fake and they fade. That is all.

    We did it!…

    I think. I think we did it. I’m still in shock and I can’t believe it, but I think we did it. It was pink. The second line was pink. Not grey or “shadowy”. It was PINK. It was so pink, I didn’t have to show The Hubs where it was. He could see it … Continue reading

    Facebook sighs

    I sit and sigh and continue to torture myself. I just sit stare at more baby pictures and pregnancy announcements and birth update statuses. It goes in waves. I’m not sure if they are waves of recognition or waves of increased posting but I admit it weighs heavily on me now that we’ve set the … Continue reading


    I’m going to start a business called 1-800-you-vent for people to call and get a confidential, sympathetic ear and then go merrily about their day without being subjected to advice or criticisms or having to worry about their reputation. Why? Because the last part of that concept seems to have disappeared and I don’t feel … Continue reading

    Life, death and laundry

    Life. New life. Two happy lines on a pregnancy test. I saw them over and over and over on Friday night in my dreams. Strong, positive test after strong, positive test, and all the while, even in my dreams, I seemed completely incredulous. “This is not happening. This can’t be real. Is this really happening.” … Continue reading

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